Poem

Grackles harass the cat as he lays at my feet, pacified on dried food.
He says he'll chase one later when it's not so hot out.
He's a perfect killer.
A bundled mass of death and fury.
But he's a lazy bastard sometimes
And it is pretty hot.

jack

i had a dog named jack.

he was a great dog, my favorite so far.

an irreplaceable little mutt

who would wait for me at the end

of the driveway for my return from school.

he didn't know he would be shot

one day by the neighbor.

he never questioned fate

never thought of that day

never contemplated mortality

never sat up late smoking,

wondering why he kept going.

he was a dog, the best dog.

happy to be a dog.

how goddam lucky he was.

Random poem

Hydraulic sign siding for the enemy
Call down the wrath of Odin on us now.
Footage spring.
Spake of nothing swell.
Dad is loose in the mind.

I'm in the pit of the hell I created and there are no judgement day preachers big enough to pull this rusty truck of me out.

Loans recalled in loves and life I lingered too long over.
Interest in speaking howls instead of jargon make the Swiss army heart wary for new planets and constellation erections.

This bro is the end.

Honeymoon in hell

My marriage is collapsing under the weight of my own inability to get my shit right. The pressure to leave art for the family is overwhelming. I am on the verge of huge breakthroughs but I keep getting snatched back from them by talks, lectures, ultimatums, failure parades, and the mundane. This thing I decided to pursue is selfish. It eats time and attention and I have been living in my own head more than in the house. Something is going to break.

I am in limbo. Awaiting the next fight or the next stupid thing I do to push me over into spiraling depression and anxiety is terrible. There is no clear path ahead and the woods go on forever.

Art is no fun anymore. It's a choice that comes with emotional shotgun blasts.

Die Facebook die

I killed m Facebook page. It was easier than you think. I evaluated the time and the content and the 'relationships' on there and found dissatisfaction.

No one reads this blog. It's almost a daydream meandering that I can plant somewhere in the world and be assured that feedback will be minimal. There're no stupid ass cat pictures, no cute stories about overcoming life's obstacles with meaningless TV cliches.
It's just me. Maybe just me is how it should be. I don't want to depend on ethereal people anymore for my intellectual fix. I'll post to nothing, in search of no one's approval.

You can however follow me on twitter.
Not really.